I've always joked about my lack of attention--about jumping from project to project, not being able to watch movies all the way through without having something else to do, not listening in meetings, working on one task for five minutes at work, then jumping to another, then another, etc...

It was all just part of my personality... right?  

Apparently I was wrong.  I'd battled depression for years--therapy, tried every antidepressant possible... Things would seem to work for awhile and then everything would come crashing down again.  Finally my family doctor, just a few months ago, after apparently giving up and admitting he didn't know what else to do, decided it was time to refer me out to a psychiatrist.

Best. Move. Ever.  First of all, he's awesome and within half an hour had figured so much about me that I was totally blown away.  We totally click and I immediately trusted him.  He was the first one in my life to suggest that I might really have ADD... and that all the depression we'd been treating all those years was actually a symptom of it, not an actual disorder in and of itself. It opened up a totally new world for me.

Since then, I haven't looked back.  It's been about four months, so I know I still have a long way to go... but with his help we're getting close to the right combination of meds that have me feeling like myself again.  A feeling that I haven't had in YEARS.  I get things done at work and home, interact more freely with people, pay attention in meetings, don't get distracted by every little things that comes my way... What a change!!

The meds don't fix everything.  I'm still working on the organization and confidence in my job that I've lacked for so long... but it all seems so possible now.  And that's such a huge step, after having lost hope of ever feeling better.

I know now that there's hope.  SO much hope.